15 October 2006
Such Great IdeasYou don't learn much from Environmental Science classes, you know. Not that I'm against it, but everything you hear and see there is something that I'm pretty sure you have heard or seen before. Don't tell me you don't know global warming? Smoke from cigarettes? Layers of the atmosphere? Water cycle?
Which is why to me, it's just a class for making up and polishing brilliant ideas that doesn't have anything to do with anything at all.
All this talk about global warming and a new ice age made me think of such a useless idea. What if you crossbreed a snow leopard (a cool-looking land animal I'm pretty sure you won't see personally your whole life) and the Philippine Eagle (you know, the greatest eagle of them all...)? Never mind if that can't really happen, who cares anyway, but all I want from this crossbreeding is for the Philippine Eagle to acquire the snow leopard's color (which technically makes it just a small genetic modification, not a crossbreeding). Cool, you've got a Philippine Snow Eagle, which eats monkeys and has a coat that makes it damn vulnerable to all those illegal hunters.
Conquering the World, The Pisay Scholar's WayAnother such idea that came to me after discussing global warming, the ice caps, snow and ice is a little bit more useful than having endangered species genetically modified so that they get extinct faster. It's the mighty (not really) Armed Forces of the Philippines setting out to conquer, what else, Antarctica! Mwahahaha!
Look, as a Pisay scholar we're trained to think out of the box. If you ask people how would they conquer the world, of course most would say they'll build up the economy, gain allies, build huge hi-tech armies before conquering each and every country and stuff. But, it's brilliant you see, Antarctica would be the last place they would set out to conquer.
"But, Antarctica is such a cold and most useless place in the world! Look what happened to those penguins in Madagascar when they arrived at Antarctica!"
Or so you think. Yes, it's cold and there are few people there (when the elite forces and advance elements of the mighty Philippine Army arrives there, they all the odds against them: scientists drilling holes, fishing, watching penguins...). But Antarctica would be the fastest way to world domination!
Let's just say the mighty AFP has finally reached Antarctica after their rusty World War 2-era ships clumsily but successfully dragged their way through the wide oceans. They would have fistfights with the nerds drilling up ice there, and hopefully would be finally able to control the area after a few struggles. Then they can say to the whole world,
"We have Antarctica! Yes, we are fools; we conquered such a useless place! Or so you say! All the people in the world would give us all their money, if they don't want us melting all the ice here and triggering catastrophic global disasters! Mwahahaha!"
Therefore I conclude, don't let your imagination work too much after watching The Day After Tomorrow.
HeadlinesOne morning, I turned on the AM radio.
"North Korea has just detonated a nuke! Russian reporter famous for criticizing Vladimir Putin, dead!"
Isn't it a wonderful world?
War CrimesThe phrase just comes to me as redundant and sarcastic. Isn't war itself a crime? Isn't killing each other, because someone who has authority told you to do it, immoral?
War crime. War is crime itself.
Why We Scholars Are CornyFirst of all, before I can make any argument, you have to admit first that you're corny. Yes you, you Pisay scholar.
You know, there's a better reason why we are corny. No, we're not nerds!
We're corny because we are the best of the best students in the country. Everyday we fight our way through the most boring and most challenging of classes, work our way through the longest and the hardest homeworks. Everything is against us. All the pressure that works against students is on us.
Of course, this brings tension and stress. And where there is stress, there is a way to release stress - jokes and fun in general. Because we have more stress than usual, we should have more 'releases' than usual. It just happens that there are not enough good jokes in the world, so we subconsciously rely on the plentiful corny jokes to release extra stress.
May you not hate me for anything I've said. Nyahaha.
--
"
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible."
-
George Burns
posted by
DJ at
15:15
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